I know it’s only Monday but the new Black Panther trailer is the Blackest thing I’ve seen all week.
Brother/sister love – Shuri and T’challa giving each other dap!
I know it’s only Monday but the new Black Panther trailer is the Blackest thing I’ve seen all week.
Brother/sister love – Shuri and T’challa giving each other dap!
LINK: Wakanda Is an Afrofuturist Wonderland
Well, it’s almost Halloween and so naturally, as it does every other day of the year, my mind turns toward scary movies. I can’t out a whole movie on here but I can share with you some of my favorite short films. I like monsters, so most of these have monsters. I like comedies, so some of them are funny and there’s a couple of these that scared the living shit outta m
This movie infuriated me, especially after I realized what was actually happening:
You guys know I’m not a fan of spiders, so I was reluctant to watch this one, but it just so happens it has a surprisingly funny ending:
I saw this one last year, and it stuck in my mind for a whole year, but I’d forgotten where I’d seen it, and the title. It took me some time to find it again, and it’s still scary:
Yeah, this one is very, very, creepy:
Yeah, this one is creepy but hilarious, and I think I remember this song from my childhood.
This is a little longer than the others but it’s worth the wait and it’s funny.
This one isn’t particularly scary but it has zombies in it and I thought it was deeply cute:
Here’s a slightly different haunted house story:
This isn’t what it seems:
Okay, this is the one that made me actually scream out loud:
Hope you enjoyed these. I’ll have some more on Halloween!
“When we encounter Calvin in the beginning, he’s not maleficent,” said Daniel Espinosa, director of Life. “I think that in the other sci-fi movies, the unknown is always a threat. In my movie, the unknown is created somewhat by us. It’s not a question of what unknown does to us, but what do we do […]
I imagine we’ve all done this. We see a DVD, and who happens to be the on the cover but Christopher Lambert, star of such classics as “Highlander,” “Mortal Kombat” and that one Tarzan movie that was actually kind of like the books? Obviously Lambert, sporting a wide eyed and wide mouthed vampire scowl, is […]
Read Fahima Haque’s piece at The New York Times.
When The Sixth Sense was released I made a date to go see this with my little sister. We both got scared out of our wits, but we loved it. Since that time, she and I have gone on to see several more horror movies together, and my niece and nephew also love the genre.
Of course, our love for it comes from Mum, who is a horror movie junkie. If people aren’t being horribly killed, or eaten, in a movie, she usually gives it a pass.
Fahima emphatically states that the Horror genre isn’t just for White men. Ladies love it too, and that includes Women of Color. This is why I’m going to do some of the reviews from the Supernatural Fox Sisters list of 31 Black Women in Horror.
Some interesting articles and news items from the past week.
Race and News Media
Race at the Movies
*I’m a person who studies these subjects, and while I did know about some of these issues, I still managed to miss some of the others:
On Harvey Weinstein
*Sexual abuse and harassment in Hollywood is an industry wide phenomenon.
*The fallout from Rose McGowan being banned from Twitter was White women’s allyship being called into question by WoC, when White women decided to boycott Twitter in support of McGowan.
*An unexpected Tweet from Terry Crews on his own brush with sexual assault, and why, as a Black man, he never told anyone:
Black Movie Critic List
*Earlier I did a post on finding Black critics of Black media like Luke Cage and came across several, including an organization developed specifically to support such critics.
On White Men With Guns
*I feel some kind of way about watching this show, especially after what happened in Las Vegas..
Let’s talk about The Punisher, for a second. You know, the guy with the massive guns, chip on his shoulder, and penchant for killing people?
Are we gonna talk about how his whiteness plays into people’s acceptance of him?
Are we gonna talk about how his use of violence is pretty much accepted and lauded because of the fact that he’s a white dude?
Are we gonna talk about how Jon Bernthal had to fight to make Frank Castle unheroic on set, and how fans are still going to talk about him like he’s the greatest thing since Iron Man?
Are we gonna talk about how Frank’s whiteness allows him the space to be violent, gory and still sympathetic? While Black heroes (like David Walker’s Nighthawk) do the exact same thing, but aren’t supported?
On Rick and Morty Fans
I’m not a fan of this show. I just don’t have the patience for any of the character’s shenanigans at this time, but I’m thoroughly and completely appalled at what most fandoms have come to, at this point. Geek fandom was never a healthy place for me, to be honest, but fandom today seems to be especially toxic, with an influx of the kinds of people who have no idea how to be fans of pop culture, (although to be fair this has been happening in sports for decades.)
Free PDF Book List On Race
Found from various places online:
Sister Outsider: Essays and Speeches by Audre Lorde
Critical Race Theory: An Introduction by Richard Delgado and Jean Stefancic
The Black Image in the White Mind: Media and Race in America- Robert M. Entman and Andrew Rojecki
Ain’t I a Woman: Black Women and Feminism – bell hooks
Feminism is for Everybody – bell hooks
outlaw culture – bell hooks
Faces at the Bottom of the Well – Derrick Bell
Sex, Power, and Consent – Anastasia Powell
I am Your Sister – Audre Lorde
Patricia Hill Collins – Black Feminist Thought
Gender Trouble – Judith Butler
Their Eyes Were Watching God – Zora Neale Hurston
Medical Apartheid – Harriet Washington
Fear of a Queer Planet: Queer Politics and Social Theory – edited by Michael Warner
Colonialism/Postcolonialism – Ania Loomba
Discipline and Punish – Michel Foucault
Capitalist Realism: Is There No Alternative? by Mark Fisher
Cultural Theory and Popular Culture – John Storey
Michel Foucault – The Archeology of Knowledge
Here are some of the shows I’ve been looking at this month. There’s a lot of releases, and I can’t keep up with a lot of them, but I’ll watch what I can and get back to you on what I thought about them.
The Gifted Season Premiere
I’m simply not in the mood for this show, and I’m fed up with this type of plot, now. It’s loosely based on some of the X-Men and New Mutants comic books, in that it has some Sentinel plotline, and some of the characters from those groups. Stephen Moyer stars as a lawyer who used to prosecute mutant criminals, and the father of two young mutants, now on the run from the government, which is rounding up mutants and imprisoning them in scientific camps.
I tried watching the first episodes, and while I like a couple of the characters, the show is simply not compelling enough to keep me watching it every week. The characters have the usual teenage angst, with superpowers, that made me dislike the First X-Men movie. Blink is a teenager who can teleport by creating portals, and Thunderbird, who is Native American, is a kind of tracker of people and things. I’m dismayed that the show used the Native American tracker stereotype, as that’s nothing like Thunderbird’s actual powers in the books, which consists of speed and strength.
And I’m just not here for yet another plotline of people with superpowers being rounded up and used by the government. This seems to be the only plotline they can come up with for superpowered characters, especially on TV, and once again, there is only the focus on how this affects White, suburban, middle-class families.
Just like with the show Heroes, there is no focus on how the discovery of superpowers would affect any marginalized communities, something I would consider much more entertaining, and which the show Cleverman handled with a certain amount of depth. As I complained about before, we keep getting stories about middle-class White characters being subjected to the same oppressions that have been visited on marginalized communities. This show would have had far more depth and been much more interesting if it had been set in the G/L community, or the Black and Latinx communities, in which this type of interment is already occurring.
In the forties, the Japanese were rounded up in internment camps because they were considered a danger to the US, and later, authorities used to raid the gay and lesbian communities and lock them in jails with the full force of legal authority behind them. Today, its immigration officials grabbing random Brown people out of their homes, and locking them up on suspicion of being illegal immigrants. What do you want to bet that none of these things will be addressed in yet another show where we see average White people being treated in the same manner?
Legends of Tomorrow
I’m looking forward to this new season. I really enjoyed the season premiere, which was a lot of fun and addressed a couple of cliffhangers from last season. This season will also introduce one of my favorite characters. Constantine.
Constantine’s show was something of a bust, but I think he’ll fit right in on this ensemble show, because he just works better when interacting with other super powered, snarky, characters, and yes, the writers have promised to keep his canonical bi-sexuality intact, something which was never addressed in his own show.
Also, returning this season is Captain Cold, played by the very candilicious, Wentworth Miller.I always loved his dynamic with Heatwave (yeah, I totally ship those two) and I’m looking forward to the two of them meeting again, especially after Cold sacrificed his life to save the team, in a previous season.
I generally like all the characters on this show. My top favorite is Firestorm. I remember reading those comics as a kid, and briefly again in the 90s. He’s an interesting binary character of an older White man named Stein, and a Black teenager named Jackson, and I love the friendship that has developed between the two of them. The show has managed to carefully avoid the stereotype of the Black brute, who is nothing but the muscle in their relationship, by making Jackson an engineering genius, with Stein as his mentor. so naturally, Stein will be leaving the show later this season. I wonder who Jackson’s new partner will be.
I least like Black Canary, but I think that has more to do with the actress, because I like the version from the comic books just fine.
In the last season, the Legends broke the world by causing a set of time anomalies, which caused them to get kicked out of their spaceship. We open the episode with them leading normal lives on Earth. Black Canary is working, unhappily, in a department store, and Jackson is attending college. Stein appears to be the only happy one, spending time with the daughter he never knew he had, from another timeline. Heatwave, played by Dominic Purcell, is also having the time of his life, vacationing on the beaches of Aruba, before he is attacked by Julius Caesar, another time anomaly.
The team gets called back together to fix the problems they caused with all their time travelling last season. This show airs after The Flash, which is absolutely perfect, since I’m really starting to like The Flash a lot more, and have started regularly watching that.
When we last left The 99 last season, Jake and Rosa were sent to prison, for a crime they didn’t commit, by a corrupt cop. When we meet up with them at the beginning of the new season, the two of them are not adjusting well to their situation. Jake’s roommate is a cannibal, played by Tim Meadows, (he is extremely funny), but we don’t get much insight into Rosa’s situation. We spend most of our time with Jake, as he tries not to get outed as a cop by the Warden, who is trying to capture a drug smuggling ring, run by Lou Diamond-Phillips. I liked the guest stars more than I liked Jake in these episodes, and I hope to see more of Lou Diamond’s character in the future. He so rarely gets to do comedies, and I think he’s hilarious here.
Amy and Charles are working hard to find proof that Jake and Rosa were set up and come up with zany schemes to do this, even though Charles thinks his podcast about Jake should be enough to free him. One of the funnier running gags is that he invited Terry on the podcast, but the interview wasn’t successful, and Terry is confused about why.
By the end of the second episode, all is well in the Kingdom of 99, Jake and Amy have been reunited, Charles can give up his podcast, and well, Rosa remains very much Rosa. I normally do not watch shows about cops, (as I consider all of them to be thinly veiled propaganda about the inherent goodness of law enforcement), but I will make an exception for a really great, or funny show, and Brooklyn 99, along with the very politically incorrect Reno 911, are worth the watch.
The Exorcist Season Two
Well, I think its too much to say this is an enjoyable show, because its supposed to be scary, but it does star John Cho as one of the shows leads. The show does have some issues though. I’m not at all interested in the storyline of the two priests who have made off with the possession victim from last season, and the gruff speaking victim gets on my nerves after about thirty seconds, but fortunately her onscreen time can be easily ignored. I just pretend I’m really engrossed in my knitting when she’s on the screen.
John Cho’s storyline is far more interesting, as he stars as the father figure for a home of orphans with severe trauma issues. The home is being visited and assessed for its level of care by an old flame of John’s, so the show is killing it in the Asian representation column, as this role is being played by an actress named Li Jun Li, and I’ve become very invested in their relationship, although I do fear for the life of the young lady, because TV loves to kill off Asian characters, and that actress isn’t especially well known. The last time we saw Jun Li, she was the coroner from the show Minority Report, and was dressed like a Rave victim.
Well, inconveniently there’s some spooky happenings at the house and the kids are acting up and misbehaving in ways they didn’t before she came there, which increases the tension between her and John’s character as he wonders if she can be fair to him, especially taking into account their dramatic past together.
I’m looking forward to the rest of this season because its so rare to see Asian Americans as stars in a horror show. Actually, this show is pretty good about diversity, and a sensitive portrayal of children with various disabilities. The disabilities are not the source of any of the horror (some outside force is) so that’s another stereotype that’s been upended. Its not as hysterically over the top as American Horror Story, so I’m able to get caught up in the mystery without getting a headache, and the characters are all mostly likable.
I’m just really starting to get into this show. I watched most of last season and understood maybe half of what was happening, but I did like the characters, which is what mostly draws me into a show. My favorite characters are Iris, and Cisco, and I got to see a lot of both of them in the season premiere, although I like all of the characters on the show except Caitlin Snow. That actress acts like she’s in a different show altogether, but she has good chemistry with the other characters, so I can tolerate her.
Can I just say how much I genuinely love Iris. She is by every definition of the term, a rare flower. She’s gorgeous, graceful, intelligent, and heavily reminds me of Nichelle Nichols version of Uhura, an example of the kind of woman I wanted to be as a child. I hate to say this, because I really like Barry, but she is waaaay too good for him. I also love that Iris is a Black woman, because it’s so rare that Black women get to be loved, sacrificed for, or damseled in mainstream media, and I am here for it. She also gets some really nice speeches during the episode.
Last season, Barry sacrificed himself to save the love of his every existence, and entered what is known as The Speed Force. I think its the source of his powers or something. I’m not too clear on that. Anyway Cisco comes up with a way to save him, but the Barry that comes back to Earth is deeply confused and unintelligible. The entire situation is complicated by a supposed new enemy, come to challenge Barry, a Samurai with a sword that causes earthquakes. The entire crew needs to save Barry, so he can save the city.
I’m looking forward to this new season as I’ve heard that Ralph Dibney’s Elongated Man will be featured on the show. I used to read his comics as a kid. Harrison Wells will be making another appearance, too, along with a character played by Danny Trejo. Katee Sackoff is also supposed to show up as a supervillain, I think. Killer Frost has already put in an appearance in this first episode, and this season is supposed to have a lighter tone than the last, which I think all superhero shows could use a dose of.
So, I’m in, I guess.
I’ve been watching this off and on.. Its still rather uneven n tone, but hopefully it will settle down into what it wants to be by the end of the season. Its not a bad show but it wavers between wanting to be a comedy, with some rather juvenile humor, a drama relationship, and a space opera, and these three things while done effectively, are not meshing well with each other. The switches between styles can be jarring and obvious.
Seth McFarlane’s presence does bring in the guest stars, though. We got a Charlize Theron guest shot, and a cameo from Liam Neeson, which was pretty cool. I kinda like most of the characters, but the surprise for me was the ex-wife and First Officer, played by Adrianne Palicki. Her, and most of the other women, are the smartest people on the show. Most of the guys are well… kinda weird, and not too bright, but I like them anyway. There’s a metal robot, and an alien with a same sex husband, and so far the show has been very respectful of the two of them, treating them just like any other couple on the ship. I’m not sure this counts as gay representation though, since they’re both aliens from a mono-gendered planet.
Its not a bad show. Or rather, not as bad as I thought it was going to be because I was a little dubious about McFarlane being on the show and he and I don’t share the same humor. We still don’t, but so far he hasn’t done anything to actually upset me, so I’m inclined to keep watching.
American Horror Story
I’ve pretty much stopped watching this. I’m just not in the frame of mind to consider it entertaining right now, even though it may well be for some people.
I’m a lot less interested in Claire’s life in the fifties and sixties then I am in her life in the past, which is how this season has begun. In order to raise their chid in safety Claire has gone back to her own time period to raise her little girl. Her current husband has issues with this of course but is willing to wrap his head around the fact that his wife has two very different lives, and that her child is not his. That’s a lot to ask of a man, but he seems to be down for all this.
There’s slightly less Jaime in the opening episodes of this season, so I’m not really as invested as I normally would be. I generally do not like romances, and I haven’t read any of the books this show is based on, but I actually like the show for the romance between Claire and Jaime. Go figure! I guess I’m just a sucker for a period romance, I guess.
This weekend is the debut of the show Mindhunter by David Fincher on Netflix. I’ll definitely be watching it, as its based on one of John Douglas’ non-fiction books on serial killer profiling. I’ve read all of his books as he makes the topic very accessible. Also I like David Fincher. The Atlantic review is here:
My review for the first few episodes will be next week along with my long form review of Bladerunner 2049.
I was supposed to see The Mountain Between Us with Mum, but she changed her mind, the night before, and kicked me out of the house to go see what I wanted, all by myself. I really enjoyed Bladerunner, and have a lot of feelings, and thinky-thoughts about it. My review is in two parts, covering the plot and characters, in comparison to the first film and the book, and then, in part two, some of the technical stuff, like the cinematography, music, and themes.
Amended to add: The Supernatural Fox Sisters have a thread up on Twitter listing 31 Horror movies that feature Black women, and rather than review The Thing vs The Thing, I think I’m going to review a few of these movies instead, as some of them are my favorites exactly because there are Black women in them as the main characters.
I chose five of these movies from the list to review. I’ll surprise you with which ones.
Joe Lynch’s Mayhem looks to be a hit with critics, the action-horror-comedy set in an corporate law office has been getting rave reviews since its premiere at South by Southwest. The film stars Steven Yeun as Derek Cho, a man who is having the worst day of his life after being wrongly fired on the […]
As Supernatural heads into Season 13, we can’t help but wonder who might be gracing our screens alongside Sam (Jared Padalecki) and Dean Winchester (Jensen Ackles). Through 12 seasons, Supernatural has seen quite a few characters come and go. The variety keeps the show interesting, but there are those fan favorites that everyone can’t wait to see. Even when a character dies, Supernatural sometimes finds a way for them to return. Here’s what we do and what we don’t know about what characters will make appear in Season 13 of Supernatural.
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Just putting this on here. But giving a warning for the racist gibberish being quoted in the article. If you’re not in the mmod for that today, you can skip that part.
We did this in 2015.
And in 2016.
Now it’s 2017 and I’ve got at least four different posts on racebending under my belt because nerds still don’t know how to behave.
This is an ongoing project looking at the continuing state of fandom’s reaction to racebending following my first piece on how badly comic fans respond to racebending in the works that they love and three years in, people are still cutting up about racebending while claiming not to be racist.
They’re not racist, they claim in comment sections across the internet, but the idea of Black women being cast as aliens, goddesses, and the iconic love interest of the Fastest Man Alive, still sends them into literal conniptions. They assume that racebending is Social Justice Gone Wild, not the best actor/actress being chosen for the role. At multiple points, I’ve seen them claim that white redheads are being
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While at the New Yorker Festival this past Saturday, Ava DuVernay spoke with The New Yorker staff writer, Jelani Cobb, about working in the film industry and her upcoming film, A Wrinkle in Time. In an industry dominated by white men, DuVernay said, “I work in an industry built on the back of the film […]
LINK: Big-O-Tree Games Apologizes
Well, Obviously I’m going to have to resubscribe to Hulu. I’m looking forward to this show, which I hope is really strange but not as impenetrable as Twin Peaks.
Generally happy stuff to start off your week, especially if you haven’t heard some things yet:
The first official trailer for Pacific Rim is LIT!!! Hollywood is killing it with the music for these trailers, but I do have to remind them that just because a movie has Black people in it doesn’t mean you need to put rap music in the trailer. Some of us recognize different musical styles, although I realize that the soundtrack can go a long way towards getting a certain type of Black guy into the theater, (namely that no account Pooky from down the street.)
I love that we get to hear Boyega’s natural accent again in an action film. I’m definitely taking my niece to see this because she loved Mako Mori in the first movie, and John Boyega was her first movie boyfriend. This movie also heavily reminds me of The Power Rangers, only for grownups, because its more violent. (I’m pretty sure there’s also lots more of the cussing.)
Boyega stars as Jake Pentacost, the son of the late Stacker, who gets called into Jaeger service, from his underworld criminal lifestyle ,by his adopted sister, Mako.
I’m really looking forward to the reboot of The Predator franchise because it has a long history of racial progressiveness. The first movie featured the first time team up of Arnold Schwarzenegger and Carl Weathers, and I guess the makes realized they had a good thing going, because the second film starred Danny Glover ,as the hero of the movie, and Maria Conchita Alonso, who gets to live to the end of the movie. The third movie, Alien Vs Predator starred Sanaa Lathan, a Black woman as the hero of that movie and it’s one of my favorite Predator films, naturally.
It’s interesting that as many tropes about race have been created in the horror genre, it’s also been a genre that’s been very progressive in its treatment of women, and characters of color, allowing them to be heroes and heroines, allowing them to be the stars, and sometime save the day, or the Earth. But this version of Predator appears to be more mainstream and there’s always tropes in mainstream movies.
Its as if mainstream movies know no other language beyond the visual shorthand of stereotypes (or maybe mainstream writers are just a bunch of lazy fucks who are unwilling to think outside the box). Namely The Black Guy Dies First Trope, and The Smurfette Syndrome.
Mainstream movies simply don’t have track record for subverting tropes that the Horror genre does, and I’ve noticed, the more mainstream a horror movie franchise becomes, the less likely it is to star a PoC, or have the woman be the primary character. This isn’t a hard and fast rule, just a trend I noticed.
I do blame the original Nights of the Living Dead for this. Something of George Romero’s liberal sensibilities in the making of that movie (and casting a Black man as the lead), has made its way into the genre.
Also, I just love Keegan Michael Key and want to see him defeat a Predator.
I thought this was a really interesting article about casting more than one Black person per movie. Now if we can get to the point where we can cast more than one gay person per film, or one woman per action movie, or hey! let’s get all wild and shit and put two, count ’em! TWO, women of color in one mainstream movie, and let them interact with each other.
I know, it’s crazy right?!!!
“The opportunities are not so scarce. And that’s an important moment to note.”
Here is the official trailer for the live action version of Tokyo Ghoul. I’ve heard that Hollywood is planning an all out assault on Manga with live action movies of some very famous books. My stomach dropped as soon as I heard that because nobody, and I mean NOBODY, is asking for Americanized versions of Full Metal Alchemist and Akira. ( I swear to Gob, if Akira does not star Osric Chau, I’m gonna personally send J J Abrams a strongly worded letter suggesting that he go fuck himself!) Now these movies have not been cast yet, but hopefully, they learned their fucking lesson from the handful of whitewashed flops in the past few years.
Yes, it looks almost as terrifying as the anime!
Note to Hollywood:
People who are fans of these stories are well used to seeing Asian faces, and some of us have a pretty large pantheon of Asian, and Asian American actors they enjoy watching. We do not read anime, or read Manga, so that we can see White people. If we wanted to see White people in Asian influenced media, we’d just watch your whitewashed dreck!
This is why Osric Chau needs to be in any live action version of Akira. Here he is in a (kind of) fan made trailer of The Akira Project. This is AWESOME!!!!
The Twitter and Tumblr response to this article had me cackling the whole week. I mean, how do you reach a point in your emotional development, where you have had your ass beat by this person 18 times, and you still out here signing checks your ass can’t cash, even when you cheat.
Sharapova’s new memoir suggests that she still can’t seem to accept the reality that her whiteness is not enough to compensate for her own failings.
that’s like me having a rivalry with bill gates lmao
I have a rivalry with Beyoncé
It’s like I had a rivalry with god by throwing rocks at the sky.
Sharap it’s over needs to put the meth pipe down and face reality. She’s shit and a cheat. Retire.
Even illegal, performance enhancing drugs wasn’t enough to keep her from losing 18 times
18-2. That’s 90%. I don’t even have a 90% win rate in closing a car door all the way.
I have a rivalry with the sky, nothing can be higher than me.
Serena don’t give a fuck bout her. She’s literally has beef with her imagination.
*Okay , here’s some commentary on why dystopian apocalypse wardrobes always seem to consist of bondage and fetish gear. Personally I blame Mad Max for starting that trend, but this person has another theory on this very important issue:
why does so much post apocalypse media have people wearing straight up bdsm/fetish gear like. do the kinksters watch the world ending and think “oh boy i can wear my bondage gear in public now”
What I wanna know is why the spiky kink warriors are always the bad evil marauders. They might be into some weird shit and unafraid to show it but that doesn’t mean they want to go around killing dudes. They’re a tight-knit bunch. A lot of them are queer. They understand the importance of community.
If the government collapses and all laws come to an end, the people rampaging around killing and looting are gonna be like, frat boys and 4chan rejects. You can mistrust the bondage raiders all you like but they’re definitely the ones you’re going to run to for help when the neoliberal blood cultists and Nazi meme demons lay siege to your survivor enclave. There’s gonna be gayboy berserkers busting up slaver gangs and burning down warboy frat houses. The assless-chaps leather daddies and weird petplay people are gonna be the accidental peacekeepers of the post-apocalyptic world just because they’re the only motherfuckers who understand the importance of consent anymore.
Listen. Don’t come to me asking how to get the secret cadre of bisexual death commandos to protect your wretched tent village if you’re scared that we might call in the kinksters for backup. I don’t give a shit if they dress up like dogs and spend all day writing poems about butt plugs. There’s assholes out there acting like Vlad the Impaler on a meth bender and you’re afraid of seeing a nipple. Fuck you. If you really want to get rid of the MRA death gangs you’re going to have to accept that a lesbian chainsaw dominatrix or two might be involved. It’s the fucking post-apocalypse my guy we gotta weigh our priorities here
I love these Gothic Fables :
Black Diaspora Gothic
your mother tells you to go find something for her. it’s not there. when she goes looking for it, it reappears, just where she said it was.
this woman is your auntie. that man is your uncle. you have too many aunties and uncles to remember. you haven’t seen them, but they all have seen you. you know, when you were no bigger than THIS?
You do have ____ money, but you don’t know where it is coming from. It’s just that every time you put your hand in your pocket you have just the right money you need.
You buy a tin of brand new cookies. When you open it there are only sewing supplies. Tin after tin there are only sewing supplies. You continuously have cookie money, but there are no more cookies.
you take the chicken out of the freezer.your mother calls. did you take the chicken out of the freezer? of course you did – but the counter is bare. you take the chicken out of the freezer.did you take the chicken out of the freezer? of course you did. you do a double-take. there is no chicken. there is no freezer.<i>did you take the chicken out of the freezer?
You think you might be suffering from amnesia … You could have sworn you just took the chicken out of the freezer but each time you go back to check on it thawing you find it right back in the ice box. Maybe you just imagined taking it out. But this feels like the third or fourth time.. Also, hasn’t the clock read 4:15 each time you remember coming in to take it out? Just 45 minutes before mom is due home. Theres nooo way it’s going to thaw in that amount of time…
you open a tub of ice cream and find rice. you open another, and find chicken; you open yet a third, and find stew. was there ever ice cream in the house? does ice cream exist at all? you don’t know.
that girl? she your 5th cousin twice removed. both your parents got 5+ siblings and those siblings each have 3-5 kids. your great grandparents had 15+ kids and 10+ siblings. that random guy who says hi to you is actually your 3rd cousin his name is Jackson. say hi.
Your mom’s always asking you if you think she looks like Booboo The Fool. You’ve never met this person, but you instinctively know that the answer should be no. One day your mom looks a little different. Is it her, or is it Booboo?
Your mother tells you not to play in your nice clothes. After school you come home and take off your nice clothes and replace them with your play clothes.While out playing with some friends you fall into some mud. You look down and you’re still in your nice clothes. Not the other ones your switched into.In the distance you hear the distinct snap of a switch being made.
You remember there’s food at the house just before you decide to go to Wendy’s. There’s always food at the house. The food is always freshly made and hot, and although there’s a huge variety to choose from, it’s always the same dishes. Cornbread, yams, potatoes, fried chicken, biscuits, green beans, a variety of side dishes but only ever one kind of meat: chicken.You’ve never seen anyone cooking in this house. You know the people in it have full time jobs, but the food is always ready no matter the time of day…or night.
You are not The One. Your mother is not The One.No one knows The One.But everyone knows The One is somewhere.Everyone knows The One is waiting. And if someone finds The One…Pray no one ever does.
You are told to fix your face or it will be fixed for you. My face is a part of your face so are you fixing your face also? You fix your face does my face get fixed at the same time?
There’s just a little clap of thunder, not even full applause. Turn off the TV. Turn off the lights. Don’t touch the phone. Stay out of the tub. Whatever you were watching will never be seen or heard from again.
You go outside to play, but you can’t come back in, because you smell like outside. You smell like an abandoned baby bird. Not her baby bird. How does one smell like inside again? Somehow you get dinner.
Your mother had a dream. She calls every family member living or dead.
You hear your mom call your name from another room. You respond only to be met with silence. You immediately get up and start running to find your mom, knowing she expects you in front of her ASAP. The silence is deafening. You hear your name called again, this time with a sharper tone. You’re not sure where the voice is coming from but you run around, only finding empty rooms. Again, your name is called with the ferocity of nails on a chalkboard and you panic. Your mother’s voice carries…
You open the Danish cookie tin and find sewing supplies. Your trust has been broken. You have never seen the tins in the store, and when you finally do, you are afraid to look inside. Who are these people that create sewing tins with cookies on them?
the women have been doing your hair since you could sit up. the hands in your head are both familiar and new at the same time. each touch is a memory handed down from women for generations. out of the corner of your eye you see your mother’s mother’s mother’s behind you. stay still. don’t cry. tenderheadedness is a fault. you must suffer to be respectable, black girl child, the hot comb smells of seared ear skin.
Your fave Auntie makes the best potato salad. She is designated potato salad maker by the family. You get to the cookout, your fave Auntie couldn’t come and your not fave auntie made the potato salad.
Your mother tells you to take the chicken out of the freezer before she gets home. You take out the chicken. You take out more chicken. The chicken never ends, the freezer is full of chicken, and only chicken. She gets home, everything you brought up and put on the counter is not the chicken. She is furious.
Your mother tells you to do the dishes. The sink is empty, the dishwasher is empty. You search the house for dishes. You own no dishes. You don’t remember owning any dishes. What are dishes? Who are they? Your mother screams at you to do the dishes. “What dishes?” You cry. “ALL THESE RIGHT HERE!” She screams, pointing at the sink. The dishwasher. The counters. There are no dishes. But you do the dishes.
I’ve been reading the X-Men comics since the 80s and I can fully attest that this is generally true. This really is what most of the plots were in the 80s and 90s. I stopped reading the books in the late 90s, but I imagine this is still true:
– vampires vs xmen
– god damn it where is [insert xmen]
– youre a better leader. no youre a better leader. no youre a better leader. no youre a b…
– someone dies
– someone comes back to life
– THE XMEN GO TO SPACE
– magneto is in the yard and wont leave
– Time for the annual kidnapping (either Mags and Charlie or Sabretooth and Logan, occasionally others)
– House blowing up builds character
– Put that thing back where it came from or so help me
-i came back from the future because you need to stop
-your best friend turns out to be mystique
-hey look some new x kids, time to ignore the ones we already had for the rest of *checks watch* forever
-the x men are DISBANDED!!!!!
-alternate universe babies
-your best friend turns out to be a clone/xorn/psychic projection
-well i guess it was Mr. Sinister all along
-fuck the Summers family
-no seriously fuck the Summers family
-i quit the x-men but normal life sucks
-just like the last time but i guess kind of grittier
-fuck the Summers family… IN SPACE
-wellp i guess Charles faked his own death again
-goddamnit Hank don’t put that there
– who the fuck is possessed this time
– the villain is in love with storm but who can blame them
– goddammit give me my body back you’re using it WRONG
– somehow we’ve ended up in a fetish club, let’s just go with it
– we’re revamping the uniforms again! deal with it logan
– our powers are gone! now they’re back! now i’ve got someone else’s!
– who wants more trauma? too late, you’re getting it
– the phoenix force is tired
Seriously, this speaks to me for some reason:
*As a person with one of those unpredictable disabilities, where I have good days and bad days, I just found this post hilarious. Yes, I have wanted to say these things to able-bodied people:
you ever realize how able bodied people just are not expected to do things that cause them excruciating physical pain? like they’re just. not
if i shouldn’t use my cane because i can sometimes technically walk without it, it would just hurt like a motherfucker then abled people should no longer be allowed to use potholders to take things out of the oven because i mean
well they could technically pick up a hot pan with their bare hands. it would just hurt like a motherfucker
*sees an abled person using potholders*
i just think it’s really sad that you’re giving up on yourself like that
*abled person rests the day after they sprained an ankle*
‘oh come on you can’t just lie in bed. it won’t get better if you don’t run around! get up and help me!’
*abled person uses protective eyewear when handling dangerous chemicals*
‘sweetie why would you limit yourself like that.’
*abled person wears shoes*
‘some people are MUCH WORSE OFF THAN YOU and they don’t wear stupid things like shoes! stop pretending that it hurts to tread on broken glass’
Really, I actually liked The Defenders, but this post is an incredibly accurate description of each of these character’s approaches to problems:
Danny “White Privilege” Rand: Shows up in a suit, gets escorted in by security.
Luke “Harlem’s Hero” Cage: Busting in like the Kool-Aid Man
Matthew “Vigilantism as an addiction metaphor” Murdock:unnecessary staircase parkour with a scarf on his face
*Jessica Goddamn Jones: Takes the fucking elevator like a normal-ass person, what is wrong with you people.
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