Funny Stuff & Link Roundup

 

Humor:

*Pick an Olympic event at which you would most certainly excel. Mine isn’t on here, but I chose Advanced Napping, with a minor in Lollygaggin’ and/or Procrastinatin’. I am very competitive on those. I also happen to enjoy Competitive Falling Over, and Professional Lunging, but only as an observer.

natblida: “ hedaclexa: “ Tag yourself I’m competitive falling ” I’m stabbing people for points ” I’m Water Panic! I could win the gold on that one. Do they have Advanced Napping ? I’m good at that, too.plain-flavoured-english Source: heyhaughtshot

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*I love this little TV Tropes fight. Big Sky Dreaming has many such odd communications on their blog.

bigskydreaming poseyslegtattoo

poseyslegtattoo:

bigskydreaming:

poseyslegtattoo:

bigskydreaming:

sunwukxng:

poseyslegtattoo:

@sunwukxng is dropping trope names like he read the entirety of TVTropes.org yesterday and he needs to stop before I smack him

Don’t Angry Fist Shake at me. What are you saying? Is That A Threat?

Okay but Ced you have to know TVTropes.org well enough to recognize all those trope names so Who Is The True Villain here hmm?

It’s Hypocritical Humor, Because I Said So

Oh look, He’s Back. What next, you going to Destroy the Evidence like you didn’t just Dramatic Drop this Drama Bomb on our Friendly Conversation? We’ve Seen This Episode Before. Rewind, Replay, Repeat.

We Used to Be Friends, Cedric. Where Did We Go Wrong?

As You Know, This Troper is New Meat compared to The Old Master Kalen and the Memetic Badass Adam so Let’s You And Him Fight.

A classic Pick On Someone Your Own Size. *Sarcastic Clapping* Fine. Throw The Fight.

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*Its like the Hotel California. I’ve been in this place before.

hannibalsbattlebot crave-that-mineral

Fanfiction gothic

crave-that-mineral:

  • You wait for an update on your favorite fic. You wait a week, a month, a year. You wait forever. The author never updates.
  • You tell your friend about a fic you loved. A few days later they tell you they couldn’t find it. You look it up yourself. You can’t find it. You can’t find the author. “They must have deleted their account,” you tell yourself. You can’t remember.
  • You have already left kudos here. 🙂” You have no recollection of having read this fic before.
  • Your favorite writer starts a new fic. It gets progressively darker with every update. The last chapter is just a string of random letters and numbers. You want to ask if the writer is okay. You don’t dare to.
  • AO3 doesn’t work again. It didn’t work yesterday. It didn’t work last week. Has it ever worked?
  • Your friend starts writing a fanfic about you. “It’s just a joke,” they tell you. You go check it out. It’s a complete work with a major character death warning. “It’s just a joke,” you remind yourself. You refuse to read the last chapter.

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*This had me crying’, I was laughing so hard. For reasons unknown, I just love weather related humor.

karnythia nethilia

robotmango:

awed-frog:

robotmango:

it’s ninety-nine degrees outside, four fuck-thousand percent humidity, and my husband was like, “i’m gonna go for a bike ride.” and i was like “why. no. why. don’t put us on the news like that. local fool collapses on unnecessary journey. don’t do it.” so he says he doesn’t want to “hide in the house” because the sun is shining. bruh. honeybruh. “the sun is shining” does not cover it. its hot outside. its motherfucking hot as fuck outside. our outdoor plants have been crying into their hands all week. whole cars are melting into the sewer. our fucking patio umbrella developed sentience to ask me for lemonade this morning

@robotmango, you need to work for the weather forecast – this was both hilarious and sovivid it made me stand up and get some iced tea.

this is a great idea, thank you. here goes. my audition tape for the weather channel. dearly beloved. we are gathered here today to have a fucking funeral for the outdoors. it had a good run, with all its creeks and clouds and shit. pretty great. now it’s ten-thirty at night but still ninety-two asshole-sweating degrees and humid as fuck. everything is hot and slimy, like being a “borrower” that got trapped inside a bottle of shampoo and then accidentally microwaved. you can see on my doppler radar that nothing is moving around out there because everything is probably dead.  the only alive thing is the mosquito currently trying to drill a hole in my leg. no surprise that all the shitbag mosquitos are fine, since the thermostat of hell is always at the devil’s preferred temperature. this forecast has gotten away from me a little, but in conclusion fuck the sun.-Source: robotmango

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Bad Puns
rhube: “ So, this may be the best gardening joke I have ever seen. ”

Source: laddermatchthis made my day
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Culture:
Just some general cultural artifacts sitting on my dashboard that made my ears perk up.
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I thought this critique of JK Rowling was interesting. It sparked an unexpected world-building discussion of what magic in America would actually be like.

mylovelylittleobsessions:

standbyyourmantis:

cepheid-variable-star:

patroklov:

jkr doesnt understand anything about america if she thinks the northern and southern states will share the same wizarding school lollll. like the south would have formed its own school anyways after, if not before or during the civil war?

hell east coast and west coast magic has got to be different (european settlers on the east, mexican/hispanic in the whole new mexico, arizona, cali area).

not to mention historically black wizarding schools would have absolutely been a thing bc african magic survived thru slavery hello??? not to mention under slavery and jim crow laws i highly doubt black children would have been allowed to study with white students. you could even make the assumption that white slavers forbade them for using their magic at all (african magic = dark magic and all that Fun Racism)

underdeveloped and struggling to thrive native american reservation schools of magic in the dakotas?

texas has to have its own school on its own school. like its just a given fact. TEXAS WIZARDING SCHOOL QUDDITCH (like texas high school football #texasforever)

and obviously you have the elitist new england schools which everyone assumes is the pinnacle of american magic education lol

The U.S. would have tons of day schools in every region and zero live-in boarding schools.

The U.S. simply doesn’t have the same history of live-in “public schools” that England has and they make no sense at all in an American context.

PLUS all the stuff listed in this post.

J. K. Rowing has zero understanding of American culture or history.

The thing is, America is so heavily colonized that there’s no way the magic here would look similar at all to a European or British wizard. First off, you’re telling me Aztecs, Hopi, Seminole, and Lakota peoples (to name a few) would all have the same wizarding traditions as each other? No, I do not buy it. There would have been a substantial diversity between larger tribes.

Now we have first contact and you’d have Spanish and Mesoamerican magical traditions interbreeding heavily into probably a pretty solid fusion. The French tended to trade openly in the Northeast, and likely wouldn’t have assimilated as thoroughly as the Spanish but more so than the British who tended to just go “ours now, you leave.”

Then come waves of immigration, including the African Diaspora/the slave trade and focusing heavily in the south and northeast. Alongside that, you have French Canadians (Acadians) moving down the Mississippi into Louisiana and giving it a heavy French and Caribbean influence. You have Scotch and Irish immigrants moving into the Appalachians where (in some places) they’re in close contact with Cherokee and similar tribes, and in others with slaves. We can assume those groups would trade magic thoroughly amongst themselves in the few hundred years of living in close contact. You have Latin American immigration coming up through the south west and bringing their Mesoamerican/Spanish hybrid magic where it would be informed by Creole traditions formed by hybridizing French, African, and Native techniques along with the dominant British traditions. The Midwest tends to be Scandinavian, but again their magic is influenced by people they would have had trade with such as plains Indians and French trappers in the north.

Then, of course, Chinese and Japanese schools of magic coming into California where it blends with traditional Mexican schools. You have Puerto Rican, Italian, and Jewish immigrant communities living in close contact with each other as well as whatever hybrid Dutch-British-African hybrid is going on in NYC. That’s not even getting into more recent waves from Vietnam, Laos, and the Middle East, for example.

What I’m saying here is that not only would American magic look like an unholy hodgepodge to a European wizard, but there would be regional variations within the country that would be almost impossible to even work around.

I mean, say what you will about the French and British, but they’ve spent most of the last thousand years in close contact with each other and you can assume that French and British wizards and witches would probably at least know what their magic looked like. We’re talking now about cultures spread across the entire globe taking up residence in one area where they’re now surrounded by people with entirely different traditions. After a few generations, there’s going to be a lot of adaptation and adoption of techniques to the point that your grandparents wouldn’t recognize your wandwork because you’re now using something adapted from a Hmong style with a distinctly Norwegian flare and youre casting it with Incan words.

I mean Jesus, just look at the variations in American food from region to region if you don’t believe me.

I keep reblogging different versions of this post because it just gets better every time I see it

*Let’s not even get into the various regional environmental differences that require different types of magic. The wetter swamplands of Louisiana (with its French-Creole underpinnings) and moist  Delta river land of Mississippi (with its high concentration of rural Black people) is going to require a very different kind of magical ability than what’s required in drier, hotter, conditions like the Nevadas, Arizona and other desert places. 

I’ll also mention that magic practiced above the snowline would probably be very different than magic practiced in warmer climates. One would have to make allowances for the fact that, for about 4 to 6 months of the year, certain vegetation and wildlife wouldn’t be available. The air above the snowline gets cold and dry, rather than hot and dry, and maybe magic would have to be practiced differently in Chicago, vs. Las Vegas.

I like to think that a lot of the magic practiced in the north would also involve the energy of specific cities. NY for example would have its own unique flavor of magic on account of its age, location and history, and be wholly unlike anything practiced in say, Dallas Texas.

Colorado, due to its higher elevation, would probably require one to perform magic very differently from rural Maine. The Appallachians style of magic (forested, temperate environment) is going to look very different from Northwest Pacific magical styles (cool, with lots of rain in winter)  and a lot of these magical styles would be based on how to practice magic in an area with a lot of rainfalls vs. an area that receives almost none.

Certain things in the Midwest, that no one worries about, like earthquakes and hurricanes, wouldn’t even be addressed in magical systems developed there, not like in California and Florida, for example, where such events would have to be taken into consideration, and probably magical systems might spring up to prevent such events from happening, altogether.

Jkr definitely neglected to take geographical locations and environments into consideration.

 

finnnorgana Source: patroklov
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*Oprah and Ava – I think Oprah is going to play (one of the)  Ms. Witch or somesuch. That would be cool. I read the hell out of A Wrinkle in Time when I was a kid. I always imagined myself as Meg. I can’t wait for this. Ava has already called for a mixed race, interracial cast.
http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/features/oprah-winfrey-ava-duvernay-black-920196
*I thought this and the accompanying photos was awesome. I’m against the pipeline. We don’t need another Flint Michigan.

https://www.buzzfeed.com/katebubacz/lakota-standoff?utm_term=.fyGRXNoLk#.xd8BvgML0

*This is Allan G. Johnson. I love his website. He’s so insightful.He mostly writes about the intersection of Toxic Masculinity, and Racism.

https://agjohnson.wordpress.com/2016/06/14/and-now-orlando-manhood-guns-and-violence/

 Movies & TV:

This is just some meta and analysis about some of my favorite movies and TV shows. Some of these are a little academic,while  some are just posts on people’s blogs.

 

Women and Superheroes:

http://www.btchflcks.com/2016/05/superheroines-week-the-roundup.html#.V7YaWvkrIeE

Mad Max Fury Road:

https://theawl.com/the-startling-humanism-of-mad-max-fury-road-84294de4d64#.umqk7hkt9

Intervention – “Finding Hope Without Salvation in Mad Max: Fury Road”

http://www.americanthinker.com/articles/2015/05/emmad_maxem_and_the_dreamwork_of_homosexuality.html

The Faith of Fury Road

Who Killed the World? – The Complicated Feminism of Mad Max: Fury Road

Geek Culture:

Exclusionary Geek Culture Misunderstands Diversity on a Fundamental Level

Hannibal the Series: https://www.overthinkingit.com/2014/02/03/hannibal-economics/

 Original Star Trek:

https://timeline.com/star-trek-interracial-kiss-ba0948687788#.s02fznr5i

Oz the Series:

“Oz”: Ten Years Later

Alien:

Essay: Women in the Horror Film – Ripley, the Alien & the Monstrous Feminine

Fanfiction:

Fetishizing Homosexuality

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2 thoughts on “Funny Stuff & Link Roundup

  1. “I chose Advanced Napping, with a minor in Lollygaggin’ and/or Procrastinatin”

    Hee! I’ll race you.
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    …To the hammock ;D

    “our outdoor plants have been crying into their hands all week. whole cars are melting into the sewer. our fucking patio umbrella developed sentience to ask me for lemonade this morning”

    Lol, brilliant! I’m over the moon that summer’s almost over.

    I love what Oprah’s doing right now. Investing in series and movies featuring diverse and non-stereotypical characters and stories. She’s also a good actress. I loved her as Mavis in “Greenleaf” (OWN). I’ll also watch “Queen Sugar” when it debuts (OWN).

    Liked by 1 person

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