Tumblr’s Funniest Hits

 

*I’m not actually on Twitter. I mean I have a Twitter handle,  and my blog posts to it, but mostly all I do is read it, since Twitter has decided that me tweeting anything is an error of some kind. Anyway, if you want to read some of the funniest shit in the ‘verse, you have to be aware of Black Twitter. Black Twitter will drag any, and everybody, with absolutely no fucks given. Its awesome to behold, and so are some of these tweets.

You know that old saying, “Laughing to keep from crying”.? Black people could win gold medals for that. I’m still laughing about this and this was several days ago.

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*You will be crying after you read this: Racism’s Greatest Hits

jawnbaeyega ourqueenfelinefatale

wilsontoyourhouse the-pizza-man-did-it

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*Bette Midler trolling Trump on Twitter is a classic. This woman must be protected like the snowflake that she is:

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charlesoberonn:

When conservatives say that universal healthcare will make the poor “spoiled” they sound like Immortan Joe warning his subjects not to get addicted to water.

 

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*Here’s some Captain Holt action. Yeah, this is pretty much him.

Holt’s spectrum of emotions

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*Okay, this wasn’t especially funny, but it still had me squeeing, in my bunny slippers! I want it! I want it! I want it!

Vintage Black Women: Lieutenant Uhura Barbie Doll.

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  • Still squeeing helplessly! Tumblr is so good to me sometimes. (Please sign up for Tumblr and start your own dashboards, for the highlighted blogs, if you can’t visit them individually.) Osric Chau as Captain America is lit!

Oh damn.

Ladies and gentlemen, imagine if you will…Steve Yoshimoto Rogers.

Growing up in the depression in San Francisco, Steve tried to join the Army at the beginning of the war, but was turned down repeatedly.  (He tried to explain that he was American, born here, but even if they had been accepting half-Japanese soldiers at that point he was too skinny and sickly.)  In ‘42 he and his best friend Bucky were shipped to Manzanar – by ‘43 they were accepting Nisei soldiers, and he and Bucky were both yes-yes boys. Bucky joined the 442nd but they still didn’t let Steve in – the conditions at the camp hadn’t done anything good for Steve’s health. Without Bucky there, there was nobody to keep Steve out of trouble, fighting the guards when they tried to bully the other internees, and by the end of ‘43 Steve was sent to the prison camp at Tule Lake with the other “incorrigibles”.  It was there he met Dr. Erskine.

Imagine if this was the face of the symbol of America.

Holy shit, I love this, I WANT this.  I want an ongoing 150 issue three-year series of this.

Source:

ITS A SHELLPHONE

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*I know some of you are Parks& Rec fans, but I’m more of a Aziz Ansari fan. I just love his answer to this question.

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*While Tumblr is often deeply silly, that doesn’t actually mean that its wrong. This conversation went unexpectedly deep right in the middle of it.

The End, by

Alister Lockhart.

Bruh, if you don’t think that having historically significant events well documented from multiple perspectives is a good thing, then idk what the hell u doin.

Besides, like, that is literally a Giant Monster Rampaging Through The Town. What the fuck is the everyday person gonna do other than Tweet/Instagram/Post about it going “It’s the apocalypse you guys! Eyyyy lmao #apocalypse #deathrising #nofilter”?

And heck, even if your own death is inevitable getting information out could help save other people, even if it can’t save you. ‘Here are 20 livestreams of the giant tentacle monster including how it moves and attacks, how can we beat it?’ is way more useful than ‘an entire city got wiped off the map and things smell vaguely of calimari idk man’

reblogging for this perfection: ‘an entire city got wiped off the map and things smell vaguely of calimari idk man’

 

Point #1 on this here article talks about Robert Landsburg, a photographer who realized he wouldn’t survive the eruption of Mt St. Helens (too close to outrun the ash cloud) and used his own body to shield & preserve the photos and recordings he’d been taking during the explosion

these surviving photographs are still CRAZY VALUABLE to this day for the rest of the volcanologist community, since actual recordings of an in-process eruption are so dang rare

on-site documentation of any major disaster is gonna be VITALLY IMPORTANT to the people who are tryna figure out how to prevent that shit

tl;dr have your phone out, make your death-by-kaiju worthwhile to the scientific community

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